Car-robbing slasher can’t escape police

When a 27-year-old heard his car alarm blaring at the crack of dawn Sept. 1, he suspected he was about to join the ranks of folks lining up at the auto glass shop.

Not if he had anything to do with it.

The man exited his home on the 100 block of West 197th Street around 7 a.m., to find a dude rifling through his vehicle for goodies, police said. Before the perp could get away, the vehicle owner confronted him, resulting in a bit of a sidewalk fisticuffs.

The robber slashed the car owner on the left hand and forearm with a knife, police said. Realizing he was bleeding, the man tried to get away, but the robber slashed him across the stomach.

“You did it now,” the robber said, according to police.

Luckily, officers arrived in time to arrest the guy and charge him for his crimes.

When they searched him, police reportedly found burglary tools, several credit cards, and an assortment of stolen cash.

The victim’s cuts weren’t serious, police said, and he’s fine.

He’s snatching your Netflix

A woman came home to find she should probably start hiding her electronics because someone’s slipping through windows and taking stuff.

She returned to her Valles Avenue home around 1 p.m., on Sept. 12 to find the living room window open, according to police investigators.

Then she noticed two laptop computers missing from the apartment, but nothing else.

The sticky-fingered thief left the same way he came in, authorities said.

Detectives are still investigating.

Have hat, will travel

Hey, have you heard the one about the fashion-conscious thief who just had to have every snazzy accessory he saw? If not, strap in.

A man walked into a business located on the southwest corner of Broadway and West 236th Street on Sept. 4.

He noticed a baseball cap on a desk, police said, liked it, and decided to add it to his collection.

The hat’s rightful owner tried to get the piece of haberdashery back, according to a report, but the man was already making for the door.

A second person tried to intervene, police said, whereupon the hat thief wielded a screwdriver and said, “I have to go back to jail.”

Outside, the alleged perp began running for freedom when he bumped into a vehicle, hitting its side mirror. When the motorist told the mad hatter to watch where he’s going, the guy reportedly took out his screwdriver again and said, “Try me.”

But he didn’t get far. Officers with the 50th Precinct nabbed the guy, ending his reported cap capers.